lowermarshhammer 2:01 Sun Dec 9
Kill it cook it eat it
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Hit a pheasant in the car, it's now hanging in the shed awaiting for a week before it's plucked and casseroled.
Shooting a pheasant is piss easy and not much of a sport in my opinion so I'm definitely not into that but I'm certainly not going to waste a dead one...
What have you cunts killed with your own hands / car / gun / priest etc, and eaten?
Sorry if this is upsetting for the lentil soup merchants. Your choice is valid as is mine.
Bon appetit.
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Replies - Newest Posts First ( Show In Chronological Order)
angryprumphs
6:10 Sun Dec 9
Re: Kill it cook it eat it
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When I was 14 I used to work in the Kitchens at the Booth House in Felstead, when it was quite a posh restaurant. The chef once took my to the local farm where they got their chickens and I had to ring one of their necks and bring it back to cook.
Did teach me a lot about where food comes from, think more people should try killing what they eat, makes you respect it.
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LeroysBoots
4:29 Sun Dec 9
Re: Kill it cook it eat it
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Inadvertenly killed about a dozen or so pheasants with my car
Where I used to work, Hildenborough, I used to take the country lanes and the early starts in the summer meant the doziest of birds, Pheasants, would just walk along the middle of the road, so bosh, instant road kill !
2 or 3 at a time several times...CARnage
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Hammer and Pickle
3:42 Sun Dec 9
Re: Kill it cook it eat it
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Alfie 6:52 Sun Dec 9
You are brilliant.
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Far Cough
2:11 Sun Dec 9
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Talking about roadkill, this is fucking hilarious:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ty6JPyr2XZ0
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Toe Rag
10:17 Sun Dec 9
Re: Kill it cook it eat it
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Caught a good few sea bass off Suffolk this year.
I didn’t know that you’re only allowed to take 1 bass per person though because of collapsing stocks.
How the hell they’re supposed to police that is anybodies guess.
Anyway, crime never tasted so good.
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Crassus
10:17 Sun Dec 9
Re: Kill it cook it eat it
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Fishing the Upper Wye, we caught trout and grayling, big grayling
Clumped and gutted a few and popped them in a home made smoker on the bank,
Pleasant lunch on the riverbank with a fresh crusty baguette
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Fade & Die
10:12 Sun Dec 9
Re: Kill it cook it eat it
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My dog has caught wood pigeon, squirrel, rabbit and pheasant.
I've taken them all home and cooked them. The dog got the rabbit and squirrel I got the pheasant and pigeon.
And yes I know that it counts as poaching but it seemed better than chucking them into the bushes
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Grumpster
10:06 Sun Dec 9
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Lucky you weren't seen, as it's illegal to take your own road kill.
Not my cup of tea, but my cousin will always take home amy decent sized animal if he sees someone else hit it.
His biggest one was a deer which was massive.
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jfk
10:03 Sun Dec 9
Re: Kill it cook it eat it
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lowermarshhammer 9:30 Sun Dec 9
I wouldn't normally dream of considering eating any fish from a river in the uk (apart from maybe a wild salmon or sea trout if it's above board)but my mates English and lives in France.They have a different attitude to us and they will munch pretty much anything.
Apparently river caught pike can make good eating as you say but we went about cooking it the wrong way after a couple of bottles of the local red.
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Bungo
9:52 Sun Dec 9
Re: Kill it cook it eat it
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Murdered a curry last night.
Yark, yark....
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lowermarshhammer
9:43 Sun Dec 9
Re: Kill it cook it eat it
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Mace 66
I took out a robin with an air rifle when I was about 9 and still feel the same guilt that you do.
Poor thing, young boys and air rifles, really a recipe for something undeserving to be shuffled off this mortal coil. Would feel so bad if I'd eaten it, just to see what it was like but then again I'm not French. Thankfully.
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lowermarshhammer
9:37 Sun Dec 9
Re: Kill it cook it eat it
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Lab
I've also popped pellets into wood pigeons, rabbits and squirrels. Personally I'm not sure about the shooting of some 'game' birds especially woodcock and snipe which are not bred for purpose and are hardly in abundant supply. Imagine that they probably taste damn good though, although I can't see a snipe making a family dinner. Maybe about a ten of them would do the trick but they must be very difficult to blast out of the sky what with their evasive flight pattern.
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lowermarshhammer
9:30 Sun Dec 9
Re: Kill it cook it eat it
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JFK, I do a bit of pike fishing in winter. Never really been tempted to keep one for the pot because of them being renowned for being bone central, I daresay that if you are skilled enough with a fillet knife this is less of an issue.
I always try to return any wild brown trout I catch but if they have been deep hooked in the gills they are fucked and it's butter salt and pepper time for them.
I'll get a boat out on Hanningfield Reservoir a couple of times a year now that it's an any method fishery and spin some lures. Farmed rainbow trout are fair game and get despatched and cooked in the pan once I've gutted them. Easy enough to gut and fillet and any remaining bones come out easy.
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jfk
7:51 Sun Dec 9
Re: Kill it cook it eat it
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I caught a pike about 9lb in France and cooked it (once dead) in a salmon kettle type get up.It was fucking horrible and full of bones.
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Darby_
6:56 Sun Dec 9
Re: Kill it cook it eat it
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I suspect that lowermarsh is slowly building up to telling us that he’s a tramp and that it was a cat rather than a pheasant that he killed and ate.
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Alfie
6:52 Sun Dec 9
Re: Kill it cook it eat it
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Hit a kebab in the motor. Felt terribly sorry about it. The impact was like metal mickey colliding with a warm packet of wobbly tits.
The kebab tried to scurry across the road. Wasnt fucking fast enough. My front left side wheel come into contact with it. Felt terrible. Popped it like jordans tits exploding after being prodded with a fork or a meaty celebrity cock. It went up like a packet of skips being trod on by a big pair of thickly soled corrective shoes worn by a clumsy intruder.
Fucking burst like as if someone at fords had over inflated a tractor tyre accidentsly and its gone bang pop pra - kow like a big giant tratter wheel has blown up like a little fucking pirelli nuclear bomb skiddy detonation.
The blast from the cunt actually blew off someone nearbys nose. Proper sliced it off like luncheon meat
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lab
5:21 Sun Dec 9
Re: Kill it cook it eat it
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Pheasant,partridge,woodcock,mallard,wood pigeon,squirrel,rook(young birds),dove,rabbit,chicken.
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Hello Mrs. Jones
5:21 Sun Dec 9
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If God didnt want us to eat animals, then why did he make them out of food?
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Capitol Man
3:00 Sun Dec 9
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Deer populations are crazy here in places. Hunting makes complete sense.
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FatboyChelseaScum
2:50 Sun Dec 9
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I live in Lincolnshire. We call this dinner time.
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Westham67
2:45 Sun Dec 9
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I once Karate chopped a carrot into slices, with no mercy, boiled it and ate it ,
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